The Discipline of Detachment

Consider the story of the man who approached Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good must I do to gain eternal life?” Jesus answered by telling the man to keep the commandments. The man stated he has observed all of these and then asked Jesus, “What do I still lack.” Jesus responded, “If you wish to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to [the] poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come follow me.” After hearing what Jesus said, the man “went away sad, for he had many possessions” (Mathew 19: 16-22; Mark 10:17-31).

We are all called to allow our unconditionally loving God to be at the center of our lives, and to allow God's way to become our way. However, the more your daily life is filled up with unimportant, selfish, or self-centered worldly desires, things, commitments, or activities, the less time and space there is for God to dwell in your life. “For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be” (Matthew 6:21).

The discipline of detachment is a process of letting go of what is not important. It is a renunciation of selfishness or self-centeredness in thought, word, and action. You seek to empty yourself and let go of those inordinate self-centered, selfish, finite, and emphemeral desires, feelings, cravings, addictions, attachments, or actions that possess or enslave you, or that separate, hinder, or draw you away from having or growing in unselfish and loving relationships with God, with others, with yourself, and with creation. You can begin by honestly acknowledging, naming, and reflecting on your selfish, self-centered, and unimportant attachments, desires, cravings, and addictions for possessions, power, prestige, pleasures, or other ways to which you have become inordinately attached.

If you desire and surrender to God's grace, the Spirit will guide, transform, nourish, and empower you to allow God to be at the center of all that you are and do. It is an inner journey, but you can open yourself to the promptings of the Spirit through spending meaningful time in prayer, the study of scripture and other spiritual writings, worship, partaking of the sacraments, communion with others, and reaching out with compassion and love in service to the needs of others.

You are invited to reflect on how any attachments you have help or hinder your relationships with God, with others, with yourself, and with creation. Bring these attachments to God in prayer and be open to God’s response. You may also seek guidance from a spiritual director or other person of wisdom.